bad news

so i’m gonna have to find a new job soon :’)

my whole section of my company is getting shut down. it’s about the nicest possible layoff, in that i have literal months to get a new job and management is actively trying to help us all get new gigs, but also: jesus, welp. i really really liked working here and all the people i work with and the fact that i got to work with an office filled with gay people who were supportive of my transition?? so basically, i’m super gutted and decided to do a bit of woo to see what my emotions actually want to do.

past – 4 of pentacles — saving money, security, conservatism, scarcity, control

this has historically been something i do — i get FREAKED OUT by not having enough money in my pocket i could survive getting fired abruptly, and leaving a known bad situation for unknown possibly greener pastures, long past the point of my own mental health. i stuck it out at a toxic job because of finances and also the sheer terror of change in any way.

present – 8 of wands — speed, action, movement, swift change

well that’s a bit on the nose, isn’t it. i quit my job, started medical transition, and also am losing my current job — everything ever is in flux! which means i gotta let go of my previous conservatism and really embrace unknowing and moving on!

future – 3 of cups, inverted — independence, alone time, hardcore partying (??), “three’s a crowd”

…i’m… gonna get cruised really hard???

i’m planning to continue to be financially independent. i’ve been leaning on my friends a bunch recently, and as much as i appreciate their support, i also don’t like needing that support/would like to get a little more stable on my own.

…and i want for a variety of reasons to meet people outside my immediate circle of friends, and then have some “alone” “time” with them B) so uh fingers crossed for the universe sending me the chance to be a giant slut, i guess :v

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2 Comments

  1. I hope that the stars align to help you achieve your slutty dreams, and also I say this part as a massive hypocrite who also hates to need to rely on friends, we are here for you as you are going through a shitty time with this work situation and should not have to face it alone the whole of that time at least!

    1. me, with great and earnest sincerity: lean on your friends for help!

      me now, with absolute bone-deep terror in my heart: UNLESS YOU’RE ME SPECIFICALLY (thank you, though ;A; i really do appreciate it)

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